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Friday 13 January 2012

Simple Elegance ~ Fun Factory's G4 Elegance

If there's one thing that makes me happy, it's pretty toys that come in colours other than pink. And if there's two things, it's pretty toys that come in colours other than pink and leave me a quivvering heap. And if there's three things, it's pretty toys that come in colours other than pink and leave me a quivvering heap, made by people who genuinely care about providing the best and most innovative products they can whilst also being as eco-conscious and health-conscious as possible. Drumroll please, here comes the G4 Elegance from Fun Factory, and me with a great, sloppy grin.

All things should be waterproof!


The Pretty
Between the odd angularity of the shape, the vivid colouring, the fancy "Loop of Love" handle and "Magic Touch" controls, and the almost coarse texturing, it is a thing of modernistic beauty. The word "funky" would not be far off the mark. The G4 Elegance is available in both Candy Green and Blackberry, and although only Blackberry is currently in stock at Lovehoney, they managed to wrangle a snazzy green one for me to test for them. *giddy*

It is deceptively basic-looking, having none of the usual bumps and nodules and spinning bow-ties, however, there's a massive difference between this and any "plain" vibe (and yes, that entendre was a double). First of all, it's big. Reeeeally big. While the specs list the circumference as 5.25" and that is roughly accurate at the largest point, it's hard to put a definitive number on the Elegance's girthiness; the angular off-oval shaping that curves around the shaft means that at any part, the size is slightly different. Given the velvety texture of the gorgeous silicone material, this makes it a bit of a challenge for anyone who isn't made more excited by the term "girthy".

The "Loop of Love" is likewise very swish, being perfectly smooth and solid. Having seen how the Lelo Insignia toys with a similar shiny coating were easily scuffed and flaked, I did have a bit of a scrabble, and was pleasantly surprised by how resilient the interior of the loop is. The white ABS plastic - much more durable and resilient than 'normal' plastic! - overlaps the edging of the silver, leaving it free of cracks and edges where it's easier to chip. It fits with the silicone body, as the whole thing is seamless curves, apart from where the silicone meets the ABS handle, where there is a slight gap, but this is overlapped in such a way that I have yet to find my zealous cleaning to require digging into it. However, it does need quite a bit of care with cleaning both before and after use, as the frictiony-velvety coating seems to draw every bit of fluff and dust in the entire street to it.

The Power
The one word that keeps bouncing through my head whenever I use the Elegance is "rumbling". While I have had more powerful vibes, I do think these are perfect when combined with the size and texture. I did find that, when I had the vibe positioned so that it was pressing perfectly into my G-spot, and was on the maximum speed setting, it was verging on painful (although still on the oh-so-good side of that blurry line, so I certainly wasn't stopping it!), so any more intense and it would have crossed over into not being enjoyable. Given I've happily taken stronger without even seeing that line, I do believe that it's how rumbley-rolling the vibrations are, coupled with the pressure-pleasure, that make that less be so much more.

I'll keep using that rumbling word, and I honestly cannot think of any other that fits it so aptly. It reminds me of that speedy popping roll of someone rolling their R's, or purring loudly. But with the weak, fleshy vocal chords replaced by an oomphy lithium polymer accumulator. I was surprised, given how my immediate instinct is to compare these rumbles of fun to noisy actions, how relatively quiet it is. Granted, it's not whisper-silent, but it is concealably quiet, and barely louder than many bullets.

L-R: On (no pattern); Increasing speed; Decreasing speed;
On (with pattern).

The six speeds are easily rolled through by holding either the (+) or (-) buttons, and increase or decrease smoothly. Unfortunately, the four patterns - accessed by cycling through them with the "BOOSTER" button (*) - are each on their own set intensity levels, and cannot be changed using these six speed settings. They are, in order: a quick, intense rumble; a strong, pounding pulse; a slower, surging pulse; and a gradually increasing surge-pulse that starts slow and increases until it's back to a gentler version of the manic pulse.

I was a little concerned about the length, as I'm a bit of a shorty, and tend to find the usual bulbous-headed vibes and dildos just ram into my cervix if they go beyond a certain point. The Elegance has a tapered tip, and while it's still relatively large side-to-side, it's a lot flatter and more paddle-shaped top-to-bottom. It also has no real core in the upper third, so while the silicone does carry the power from the motor - which seems to reside mainly in the centre - does - right to the tip, the overall curve and the tapered shaping mean it actually sits quite comfortably, stimulating the fleshy tissue around my cervix without actually trying to pry it open. Given it fills me pretty much completely full, and between the girth and the fricative texture isn't really ideal for thrusting fast and hard, the finger loop actually compliments it quite well. I found using it to slowly rock and massage my G-spot, using slow, short strokes, actually got the most out of the girth-vibe-pressure combo: I had bulges pounding into my G-spot, vibrations hitting every inch of me, with the asymmetrical stretching moving in small ripples as the curved semi-edges wind their way against my strokes... Honestly, it just does so much of the work for me, I find myself orgasming hard without putting any real effort in! Definitely a case of working smarter, not harder: work with the toy and it'll toil away while you relax and enjoy.

Controls & "Magic Touch"
The controls are fairly self-explanatory: hold (+) to turn on or increase speed; hold (-) to turn off or reduce intensity; press (*) to cycle through the four patterns. When it's on, the three button panel will be dimly backlit, and if a pattern is selected, the (*) button will slowly flash aswell. Whenever you press any of the buttons, it will also glow more brightly until you let it go. Also, if you're holding the (+) button and hit maximum power, it'll flash instead of glowing steadily. But sometimes, that backlighting will pulse for no gosh-darn reason! I've tried searching everywhere, and cannot find anyone who can fully explain what those wacky Germans were trying to do with the "Magic Touch" feature where the magnetic connector on the back can, seemingly at random, make the buttons flash. Theories range from pressure, to heat, to motion-sensing. All I know is that if I leave it on the bedside unit, and breath in its direction, I'll have neon pulsing lightshows projecting on my wall.

Will madam be having the orgasm or the seizure this evening?
I was amused by the coincidence, that within the same week, I got my lazer-show of a vibrator, a colour-changing scented candle, and some wee duckies for the bath that get all disco in the water.  It did mean I spent a rather inordinate amount of time pondering just what it was that made them all work: all have some kind of metallic connectors that kicked things off, but the candle had heat alone, the duckies would flicker just as happily on cold water as hot, and the Elegance can be activated by my touch, which is neither liquid nor flaming.  If anyone has a clue, please do let me know, as it's the kind of thing that will drive me bonkers until I figure it out!

Anyway...

Given there's no way to turn this feature off, or in fact lock the controls at all, I'm a little disappointed, but having to put it in a drawer before lights-out isn't a deal-breaker, irksome though it may be.


Magno-Charging!
Fun Factory are, quite rightly, proud of how their newer vibrators are taking steps towards being both better for our bodies, and better for the environment. Now, I don't understand all the science, but obviously rechargable toys mean less batteries being shipped off, and since the lithium polymer technology means they're safe from the "memory effect", they should last longer than the kind of batteries that require complete discharge before recharging. And, because Fun Factory have committed to making sure that all their toys developed from now on will share the same charging system, that means less need for having hundreds of different chargers. Plus, the magnetic connector means it's 100% waterproof, which is always a plus.

On the negative side of things (hurr hurr, magno-pun!), it is a bit finniky. While the connector will only attach to the magnetic FUN logo one way, it isn't always dead-on enough to make a true connection. Once it snaps into place, wiggle things about until the FUN logo on the charger glows bright, solid red: if it's dim, flickering, or off, then the charge won't be getting through. The backlight on the Elegance button panel will also pulse while charging. It can shift while charging, so make sure to check back now and then. I found that, despite literature to the contrary, the red light never went off, even when it had well exceeded the six hour maximum charge time, and the lights on the button panel had stopped glowing, so using the red light to check the connection, and the toy's lights to check if it's still taking a charge. Once fully charged, it should last for half an hour at maximum power. I've found it lasting a bit longer than that, and well exceeding that when using it normally, i.e. not on constant full power.
Props are better than having to check back
every ten minutes and peer at the light!

Care/Safety
As I mentioned, it's a fuzz-magnet, so be sure to clean it before and after every use with warm water and a mild soap. It is hypoallergenic, medical-grade silicone, so could probably stand a harsher cleanser, but it shouldn't be necessary. Due to the funky type of battery, Fun Factory advise storing it fully charged, and recharging it at least every three months whether used or not, to maintain the integrity of the battery. And, as the toy, charger, and packaging all have some form of magnetism involved, keep them away from things like credit cards and things that might be damaged by magnets.


    Pros
    • Deliciously girthy, but pushing into different spots instead of just stretching;
    • Unusual shape and very pretty design;
    • IT COMES IN GREEN!!!
    • Strong, solid vibrations;
    • Nice and quiet;
    • Made by an eco-conscious company, so you can feel good while you feel good;
    • Rechargeable always wins over ye olde batteries;
    • Makes me feel like I'm being beaten into cumming!
    Cons
    • Charging is awkward;
    • Fluff-magnet, even in a storage bag, it seems to find dust;
    • Can't lock it or turn off "Magic Touch" lightshow;
    • Has my brain running overtime trying to get to the bottom of the "Magic Touch" activation mystery!

    This toy was provided to me free by Lovehoney in exchange for a fair review.  I have received no payment and my opinions have not been influenced in any way.

    2 comments:

    1. I've a few of the magic touch G4's and yes!!! I too wonder just how it works. One of those life mysteries we will never know!!!

      ReplyDelete
      Replies
      1. Hah, glad to hear I'm not alone in my confusion. :)

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